critical thinking

Divorce Woman and Man

March 03, 2009

These few days I followed some gossip stories, LOL. It's not a hobby, but since a couple weeks i didn't do something useful. The gossips were about the musician divorces. Started from Ariel 'Peter Pan'; Rizki 'The Titan'; Pasha 'Ungu', and there were also gossip about their wifes. It remind me the about the story about the musician husband and wife, that often came out at the television, Saipul Jamil and Dewi Perssik (both of them are Indonesian dangdut singer).

Not their personal gossip that become my attention, but how the television depicted their statues. It is so not fear for me when I saw how the television made a news about their divorced status.

One of how they depicted the divorced woman status was when they talking about Dewi Perssik. So many times television made Dewi Perssik as the beautiful divorced woman that love to show up her body, love to show her boyfriends after divorce.

One time, the television told a story that Dewi Perssik tried to find other man to exchange her ex-husband position. And I almost never heard the story about her ex-husband, Saipul Jamil. Sometimes, Saipul Jamil came for commenting the Dewi Perssik stories.

Another story when Dewi Perssik faced the defamation case from her ex-manager. The point of the information was suddenly become blur, and they focus on her man companion beside her. Television also put Saipul Jamil as a wise man that always support her and giving her comfort and save. And they, then, add that Dewi Perssik now having a close relation with another artist. It seen that Dewi Perssik depicted as someone who is helpless if she had no man around her.

Another program at television also made a statement that divorce woman status is something negative. Plus, the statement from Dewi Perssik itself that makes the divorce woman not even better. In one chance she said "Oh well, what can I do, I am a used thing." This is makes me think how television help to depicted about divorced woman. They are depicted as someone who is helpless without man or they will be stamped as bad woman, so the divorced woman should find another man to let the divorce status gone from her. The television also made a negative story about how bad being a divorce woman and being a free woman, and free doing anything she likes. Because when you are divorce and trying to enjoying your life, you will be stamp as a bad woman. Maybe this also part of the Indonesian social judgement about a divorce woman. But I don't know why a divorce woman who want to enjoying herself will be stamp as a bad woman.

As the comparison, let's talk about those divorce men. The television making a good story about all this divorce men. Some of their statement also said they are a "cool divorce dad (???)". The reason, because they are still young, and they are cool (???). Why there is no "cool divorce mum" too?? When you said young, Dewi Perssik is younger than all those divorce singer. Cool? What is the definition of cool it self? Sexy also can be assumed as cool too, right? And all of them are singer, and of course their vocals are superb.

This, then, show how mass media have a role to create a public perception, especially at social life. Mass media should give the balance information. In this case is about how they made story about divorce woman and man. How they depicted divorce man and woman in balance, and not judging by they own perception. Putting a statement like "cool divorce dad" also make me thing that they still look at the man as the superior human above all, and no matter what the reason of the divorce between them, the man always be the coolest one.

Divorced woman and woman actually have the same meaning, but in Indonesia social life, the meaning become different between man and woman. Especially when mass media also make a lame story about gender. Does it mean Indonesian mass media still bias gender? While in one statement they said woman and man are equal.

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